A Construction Leader’s Guide to Positivity
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Suffering is a shared human experience.
I especially notice that new leaders—or people who are striving to become leaders—can experience a fair bit of suffering along their journey.
I think of the new VP of Project Management who keeps getting yanked back into submittals and RFIs, even though they really want to lead their people and the PM process. Or the senior estimator who has the competencies for Director of Preconstruction, but the last two years’ revenue won’t support the overhead, so the opportunity is closed. Still, they can’t quite get there (yet). It can be quite painful and leave you asking yourself questions like:
“Am I good enough for this role?”
“Do people really want to follow me?”
“Am I capable of leading this department?”
If that’s you—or you manage people asking themselves these questions—start by acknowledging an important truth: you’re not broken. You’re human. And you’re in construction, where chaos can mask progress until it shows up all at once. Keep your head up.
The second step is the reframe.
I recently made a mistake with one of our customers that left me feeling sad and frustrated. When telling one of my mentors about it, he asked me, “How could the pain you’re in today be the precursor to one of the best things that ever happens in your life?” That question got me thinking about what to do next and how to make it positive, rather than stewing in the negative emotions.
This is the essence of positive framing. It doesn’t deny reality—that what you’re going through right now sucks—but it does redirect the energy. Instead of treating frustration as evidence that “it’s not working,” we treat it as pressure that forges the next skill, the next relationship, the next role.
Why positive framing works
We are highly emotional beings, whether we like to admit it or not. And because of that fact, we are constantly faced with potentially derailing emotions that can cause serious self-doubt and frustration. Meanwhile, every situation ultimately comes down to our perception.
If we think the world sucks, then we will continue being down. If we think the world is great, and whatever is happening is just a setback that can be overcome, we are much better at motivating ourselves to take positive action.
Two common stuck points—and how to reframe them
1) The VP who’s still a super-PM.
Reframe: “This pain is a signal that my team and systems aren’t yet strong enough to run without me. My job is to build the machine that makes me less necessary.”
Actions: carve one non-negotiable Leadership Block each week (2–3 hours, uninterrupted) to work on role clarity, delegation maps, and rhythm. Resist the urge to rescue. When you do jump in, document the save and turn it into a checklist or SOP so you never fix that same problem twice.
2) The senior estimator is capped by overhead.
Reframe: “This isn’t a no; it’s a ‘not yet’.”
Actions: Build a “Get Work” Strategy that you lead. Determine exactly where next year’s work is going to come from. Organize the client meetings. Study sales and read any book you can on the art of influence. Make sure you hit the goals that can justify your promotion.
Turning pain into progress
Name it precisely. “I’m stuck because I’m approving every submittal.”
Reframe it. “This pressure is training me to build a review system and raise decision quality without me.”
Pick a lever. Tool, meeting, or staffing change that addresses the root cause.
Develop the solution. 30–90 days with a clear exit ramp.
Measure it weekly. Did the lever work?
Lock the win. Convert the success to a standard (SOP, checklist, or role description).
If you’re in a season of pain, you’re in good company. Name it. Reframe it. Turn it into motion you can measure. You just might be one step away from everything coming your way. Do everything you can to make that true. Hope that helps someone out there.
Spark Notes:
If leadership feels painful right now, it’s not because you’re broken—it’s because you’re human, growing, and operating in an industry where progress is often hidden by chaos.
Positive framing doesn’t deny that things suck; it redirects frustration into pressure that forges better systems, stronger skills, and the next role.
The pain you’re feeling is often a signal: either your team needs better structure, or your opportunity is a “not yet” that requires clearer strategy and ownership.
Name the problem, reframe it, pull a specific lever, measure progress, and lock the win—turn suffering into momentum you can actually track.
